Women in ITSM: insights and inspiration

Vawns Murphy reflects on a day spent learning from women leaders and discovering the real strength of community.

So here’s the thing about working in IT. You can do all the training, collect the many, many certifications, and attend every webinar going. But sometimes the most valuable learning happens when you spend a day listening to other people’s experiences.

I was lucky enough to be able to attend the itSMF UK Women in ITSM day, held recently at the Bombay Sapphire Distillery, and there were discussions about leadership, neurodiversity, confidence, personal branding, and the future of women in technology. It was inspiring, insightful and it made me really think about how I show up at work. Here are a few of the takeaways that stuck with me.

1. Opening Keynote – Val Wilson, BT

The day was kicked off in style with itSMF UK board member and all round rockstar Val Wilson. Her opening session set the tone for the day with a simple message: Be unapologetically visible.

Visibility matters. Your ideas matter. Your experience matters. Try to make sure that, no matter what is going on, you remain unapologetically visible as women in society today.

2.  The Hidden Patterns of Neurodivergent Women at Work – Sarah Morgan, Luceat Coaching

Unfortunately, neurodivergent women are often more invisible than others in the workplace.One of the most powerful sessions at the event focused on the hidden patterns of neurodivergent women. The key point? Neurodivergent girls and women often present very differently from boys, which means many go undiagnosed or misunderstood for years.

By the age of 12, neurodivergent children can receive 20,000 more pieces of negative feedback than neurotypical children. Over time, this can wire the brain to avoid criticism at all costs. The result?

• Masking behaviours
• People-pleasing
• Overworking
• Perfectionism.

A few practical tips came out of the session:

• Lists can help when task initiation feels impossible
• Taking a pause before reacting can help manage rejection-sensitive responses
• Understanding your wiring can turn perceived weaknesses into strengths.

One line from the session really stuck with me:

“Once you have the words to explain your experience, use them to help the women coming up behind you”.

3. Personal Branding, from Expertise to Influence – Sue Carey, My Brighter Life

The next session opened with Sue asking us the question: “When you’re not in the room, what do people say about you?” That, in a nutshell, is your personal brand. Your brand isn’t about bragging or self-promotion. It’s about the reputation people associate with your name and the experience they have when working with you.

One formula shared during the session summed it up nicely: Performance + Visibility + Perception = Opportunity

Three things help build that brand:

• Clarity – What do you want to be known for? What problems do you solve? What strengths consistently show up in your work?
• Consistency – Trust is built through behaviour, especially when things get difficult. Major incidents, failed changes, stakeholder conflicts… Those moments shape how people see you.
• Visibility – Translate your work into impact. For example, turn service metrics into business outcomes, explaining risk reduction and framing improvements as strategic progress. In short, make the value of your work visible.

Sue finished the session with some practical advice: audit your reputation, align your digital presence, narrate your impact, volunteer for one visible opportunity, speak before you feel ready. Every interaction either reinforces or reshapes how you are known – your brand is built in moments.

4. Micro-biases and their Massive Impact – Chelcie West, Premier League Football Club

The next session focused on inspiring the next generation of women into IT. Chelcie took us through some industry statistics and the statistics were… sobering.

• 94% of girls drop computing by age 14
• Girls are significantly less likely to pursue STEM careers
• BCS found in 2023 that, at the current rate, it could take over 200 years to reach gender equality in the tech workforce if nothing changes.

One of the biggest barriers? A lack of visible role models. If girls don’t see women working in technology, leadership, engineering, or service management, then those careers simply don’t appear on their radar. Which brings us back to that earlier point about visibility. Sometimes being visible isn’t about you — it’s about the people coming up behind you and making it easier for them.

5. Beyond the Glass Ceiling; Leading IT in a Male-Dominated World – Amie Smith, Formula 1

Amie started the afternoon sessions by exploring leadership in male-dominated environments.

She looked at traditional leadership models and how they often emphasise speed, control, direction and short term results. But many women naturally bring different strengths including collaboration, trust, inclusion and long-term performance.

One of my favourites takeaways from this session was: “You don’t need to prove yourself to anyone except yourself.”

Amie finished by talking about some of the initiatives she was running in her organisation which included women’s groups, championing diversity in recruitment and leading by example.

6. Holding your Nerve through Change – Val Wilson, BT

The next session focused on leadership during change – something most ITSM professionals are experiencing right now. Change is everywhere – new tools, operating models, AI. Even ITIL is changing. When so much is changing it can feel relentless and it puts us all under that much more pressure.

Val described change as a storm – and suggested that when the storm hits, leaders need anchors such as:

• Your values – what you stand for
• Your people – who you stand with
• Your purpose – why you do what you do.

One of my favourite quotes from Val’s session was this: “Storms come and go – they don’t last forever. When a storm comes and you feel off balance, that’s when you need to put the anchor down.”

 7. Confidence comes from Knowing how you Think – Vicky Hunter, PeopleCert

The final session brought things back to something many of us struggle with: confidence. Vicky made the useful distinction that confidence doesn’t mean certainty. You don’t need to know everything before you act.

Being the rockstar that she is, Vicky used the ITIL guiding principles to offer a solid framework for navigating uncertainty:

• Focus on value – the pressure to perform eases, the need to impress quiets, the noise reduces, decisions become clearer.
• Start where you are – you don’t need to be finished to begin, you don’t need to be perfect to progress, you bring your experience, judgement, pattern recognition and values.
• Progress iteratively with feedback – give permission to move before you feel fully certain – progress, pause, reflect, adjust.
• Collaborate and promote visibility – collaboration does not equal consensus, visibility drives alignment. Bring the right voices in, listen actively, incorporate insight and share data.
• Think and work holistically –  understanding how things connect feeds confidence. Holistic thinking is often a strength we bring instinctively – considering the impact, reading the room, seeing second order effects.
• Keep it simple and practical – simplicity builds control. What matters here? What is the simplest useful action? What would progress look like?
• Optimise and automate – it’s not just about process, it’s about energy. Where does your effort matter most? What is draining energy unnecessarily? What load could be better structured? Where is my best self needed?

Seen through that lens, confidence isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about knowing how you think, how you approach problems, and how you move forward.

That was my take on the day. Thanks so much to everyone at itSMF UK, to all the speakers, and to everyone who worked so hard to make this event happen.